In his weekly column, rapper John Brown'the self-proclaimed “King Of Da Burbz”'will be offering his insight into politics and current events to the Complex readers. Check out “Politickin With John Brown” every Thursday.
Hillary’s officially back in the building, bitches! I applaud Obama’s decision to select her for international diplomacy. I’ve always felt that sending in a sophisticated woman to engage in tough negotiations is far more affective than sending in the goons. But there’s a lot of work to be done. So here’s some tips to help us win back the affection of the world community…
When CNN.com decided to team up with Facebook for their groundbreaking live stream of today’s presidential inauguration, it meant that they left another popular microblogging site out in the cold. Poor Twitter: as instrumental as you were in bringing details to light about the Jim Jones-Neyo scuffle, no one cared what you thought about I-Day.
No one except Complex, that is. Yes, always at the vanguard of technology, we dispatched our Twitter spies to get a peek at what certain Washington insiders were saying during today’s historic proceedings…
With Hillary Clinton’s admission that she’s (finally) dropping out of the race, it must be a sad day for women in politics. But to all the girls out there worried that we might never see a female in power, we have an exciting announcement: porn star Mary Carey is back in the political arena.
Yep, the Double-D dynamo who ran for California Governor against Arnold in 2003 and again for Lieutenant Governor in 2006 has announced that she’ll be on the ballot this November for the California State Assembly election. In a statement about her new campaign, she said, “I want to energize people into caring about local politics again'much like we've seen in the national primaries. But unlike one of the presidential primary contenders, I'm actually a politician you'd want to get screwed by!” Ouch.
And Clinton better watch her back, because M.C. might be giving her a run for her money if she still wants the job in 8 years. In her gubernatorial concession speech, Mary let her true ambition shine: “Thirteen years from now, when I’m old enough to be eligible, you may see my name on a presidential ballot!” For a refresher on Mary Carey’s nuanced policies, watch a TV ad from her 2003 campaign below.
Things were so hopeless in the 2004 election that Talib Kweli didn’t even bother voting. “You try to vote and participate in the government/And the muthafuckin’ Democrats is actin’ like Republicans,” he rapped. But this time around, the Black Star MC seems fully invested in making sure Barack Obama gets into the White House.
He recently formed a new side project group with Philly singer Res called Idle Warship, and they’ve recorded a track called “Fall Back” with Star Trak’s Chester French. The song is a response to Hillary Clinton’s insistence on staying in the Democratic primary race, even when it’s mathematically impossible for her to surpass Obama. After the jump, listen to the song and watch accompanying Clinton-filled web video.
Obama could tell you Hillary is a major ball-buster, but apparently she's also a certified nut-cracking machine. The former first lady and aspiring Democratic nominee is bustin' nuts like it's her j-o-b, through use of this 9'' nutcracker that's being sold at wacky gift e-store Baron Bobfor $19.99. You can also get the apparatus (along with Hillary Clinton branded Nuts) at Hillarynutcracker.com, a site that we jacked a hilarious Feel-The-Squeeze video that features a plethora of politicians who have felt the wrath of Hillary's knack for nut destruction. Check Hillary go crack crack crack after the jump.
Understanding the ups and downs of Presidential politics can be difficult in this confusing time, when super-delegates and inexplicable Florida re-votes are all the rage. Thankfully, Fold US Candidate has created easy-to-use finger puppet versions of Obama, Clinton and McCain. Simply print out the template for each candidate, follow the folding instructions and you’ll be holding your own pint-sized debates before you know it. Check out each candidate in its pre-assembled state after the jump.
You know that silly season in politics has officially arrived when professional psychopath Jack Nicholson starts throwing his weight into the political arena, and it’s still only the primaries. The legendary actor created this new internet video featuring clips from some of his award winning misogynist-laced movies like “The Shining,” “A Few Good Men,” “Batman,” and others that should do Hillary Clinton as much good as a Farrakhan endorsement for Obama at this point. It’s only one day before the primaries that could determine if Hillary goes back to being a groupie or not.
The New York Post caught former President of the United States and current Hillary attack dog, Bill Clinton, taking a little snooze during yesterday’s tribute to Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. at the Convent Avenue Baptist Church in Harlem. Too bad Hillary wasn’t around to give Bubba a wake-up elbow. Of course, they don’t seem to do too well with staying awake together in churches. Check this video of the Clintons dozing through Ronald Reagan’s eulogy.
Amidst weak debates and back-and-forth tussles to take home Pennsylvania's primary championship belt, Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama made time to tap into the WWE's fan-base for a short P.S.A. Full of past and present WWE clichés, Hillary adopted the wrestling alias of “Hill-Rod” while Obama asked fans if they smell what “Ba-Rock was cookin’.” Republican nominee John McCain also took place in the awkward triple-threat attempt at pleasing the wrestling faithful by not only pronouncing Barack wrong, but also doing the worst rendition of Hulk Hogan's “Hulkamaniacs” shtick ever. We're hearing crickets, but see for yourself after the jump.
