Anyway, we wanted to compare these pretty white kids with problems to see which show has better eye candy. Check out our Hills vs. City battle below and vote for which cast you think looks the best…

THE HILLS‘ KRISTIN CAVALLARI vs.THE CITY‘S WHITNEY PORT
• While Kristin proudly embraces the bitch role and has no problem scheming on sloppy seconds, Whitney has some wifey credentials. Consider these two blondes the yin and yang of MTV’s reality world.
Note: There is a poll embedded within this post, please visit the site to participate in this post's poll.
————————————————————————————————————————————————————-


THE HILLS‘ AUDRINA PATRIDGE vs. THE CITY‘S SAMANTHA SVETRA
• These two both enjoy a good manhunt (read: pretty easy), but only one of them has had nude photos leak…so far.
Note: There is a poll embedded within this post, please visit the site to participate in this post's poll.
————————————————————————————————————————————————————-

THE HILLS’ HEIDI MONTAG vs. THE CITY’S OLIVIA PALERMO
• One’s a Jesus-loving freak who’s married to Hollywood’s biggest asshole, the other is just a cunty faux-NY socialite who’s really into fashion.
Note: There is a poll embedded within this post, please visit the site to participate in this post's poll.
————————————————————————————————————————————————————-

THE HILLS’ STACIE HALL vs. THE CITY’S ROXY OLIN
• Stacie’s the hot bartender that Spencer was hitting on last season, and Roxy is Whitney’s high school bud who may be adding a little drama this year.
Note: There is a poll embedded within this post, please visit the site to participate in this post's poll.
————————————————————————————————————————————————————-

THE HILLS’ LO BOSWORTH vs. THE CITY’S ALLIE CRANDELL
• Lo’s been LC’s shoulder to cry on since her Laguna Beach days, and Allie cries a lot about her model boyfriend’s wandering eyes. Sidebar: doesn’t Allie look a bit constipated in this picture? FTL.
Note: There is a poll embedded within this post, please visit the site to participate in this post's poll.
————————————————————————————————————————————————————-

THE HILLS’ STEPHANIE PRATT vs. THE CITY’S ERIN LUCAS
• Spencer’s little sister (now surgically enhanced!) loves to play the middle in all the conflicts on The Hills, and Erin is the downtown party girl who was dating three guys at one time last season. Play on, player.
Note: There is a poll embedded within this post, please visit the site to participate in this post's poll.
————————————————————————————————————————————————————-

RELATED:
• Whitney Port x Complex: The Interview, Video & Gallery
• Spencer Pratt Talks Rap Career, Brody Jenner & Why Heidi Beats Beyonce

When we first heard the news that The Hills star Heidi Montag was doing the September 2009 cover, we were hoping we’d get to see Spencer Pratt’s wifey like we never saw her before. Then we actually peeped the pictorial. WTF? All you get is Heidi rolling around in the sand like a washed up, surgically enhanced dolphin. Heidi’s fail isn’t the first miss (and probably won’t be the last) in Playboy’s history, though—check out our picks for the 10 lamest Playboy covers after the jump…

#10: HOPE DWORACZYK AND SETH ROGEN, APRIL 2009
PLAYBOY FAIL: Why the hell would we want to see Seth Rogen on a Playboy cover? Move dude! Get out the way!
————————————————————————————————————————————————————-

#9: ANNA FARIS, SEPTEMBER 2008
PLAYBOY FAIL: She played a Playboy bunny in the movie The House Bunny, which was filmed at the Playboy Mansion…and she still didn’t go nude? Fuck outta here.
————————————————————————————————————————————————————-

#8: CAROL ALT, DECEMBER 2008
PLAYBOY FAIL: No one wants to see a 47-year-old woman with a belly ring. Carol reminds us of our friend’s sketchy mom who used to buy us 40s when we were 17.
————————————————————————————————————————————————————-

#7: LISA GUERRERO, JANUARY 2006
PLAYBOY FAIL: Really? Fully-clothed? We’d jack off to a Victoria’s Secret catalog before this.
————————————————————————————————————————————————————-

#6: AMANDA BEARD, JULY 2007
PLAYBOY FAIL: We thought Playboy was going in a totally different direction when we saw Amanda Beard on the cover. Less sexy, more tranny. Not that there’s anything…uh. Yeah.
————————————————————————————————————————————————————-

#5: PARIS HILTON, MARCH 2005
PLAYBOY FAIL: This was lame because everyone saw Paris nude in that Sundance winner, One Night In Paris.
————————————————————————————————————————————————————-

#4: JESSICA ALBA, MARCH 2008
PLAYBOY FAIL: She threatened to sue Playboy and wanted a monetary settlement because she technically didn’t consent to be on the cover. We get sexier pics of Jessica on drunkenstepfather.com, and that’s for free.
————————————————————————————————————————————————————-

#3: MARIAH CAREY, MARCH 2007
PLAYBOY FAIL: No nude pics? Fail. We want to see whatever Eminem got to see.
————————————————————————————————————————————————————-

#2: OLIVIA MUNN, JULY 2009
PLAYBOY FAIL: We love Olivia, but Playboy ripped our February/March 2008 cover and still didn’t produce the goods. Here’s a hint: Only steal a cover if you can trump it.
————————————————————————————————————————————————————-

#1: HEIDI MONTAG, SEPTEMBER 2009
PLAYBOY FAIL: A self-proclaimed modern day Mother Teresa and Jesus’s number 1 fan, Mrs. Pratt paid to enlarge her twos yet still refused to unleash them for Playboy. In her spread, she gets down and dirty in a bikini, and by “dirty” we mean she rolls around in sand with her bathing suit on. Wow. Real arousing.

You don’t have to be a construction worker to wear these dope Fall jackets from Carhartt. [Daily Drop]

Just like Tony Romo, Nick Lachey doesn’t want Jessica Simpson back either! [PopCrunch]

The women of Mad Men are super sexy. [Coed Mag]

Check out real hot girls here if you didn’t get enough of them over the weekend. [Double Viking]

Sex or money? See what women would really choose. [Flisted]

Kid Cudi dropped the tracklisting to his album. [Nah Right]

Make sure a divorce is really worth it if you don’t have a pre-nup. [Holy Taco]

It’s not winter yet but the Vans “Peacoat” Chukkas are already on deck. [Daily Drop]

Ha. Kourtney Kardashian got knocked up because she forgot to take the pill. [PopCrunch]

Check out these awesome baseball fight videos. [Coed Mag]

Sit back. Relax. Look at hotties in the wild. [Double Viking]

This might be the first complete history of tramp stamps. [Flisted]

Slaughterhouse chats with Angie Martinez and declares the Wu beef pretty much dead. [Nah Right]

We usually rep for Heidi Montag and these pictures explain why. [Holy Taco]

The show is a reality competition that puts a gang of second-rate famous people in a jungle in a survival-of-the-fittest type setting. Yawn. Sure Heidi “officially” got married on The Hills last night, but nothing lasts forever, especially when you’re dealing with a character like SPratt the Ghost. Would you put a ring on it? Read on to see the evidence and vote on whether she’s a wifey or a trifey…


WIFEY? She loves plastic surgery.
When she’s older you won’t have to worry about suggesting a tummy tuck, or getting her tits re-done. Heidi is as plastic as a Barbie doll and will be the first one to realize when her looks are falling off.

TRIFEY? She gets real jealous.
Heidi was so overprotective over Spencer in recent episodes that she used to confront girls at who really didn’t even do anything wrong. That shit’s not cool, especially for people like us who flirt our asses off when our chick is at home cleaning up the apartment and doing dishes.

We took you through the history of Gucci Mane’s chains. [LINK]

Heidi Montag got the Super Twosday treatment. [LINK]

Kanye won our style war, and was crowned the best dressed rapper of all time. [LINK]

Lauren London sizzled as our Hot Complex. [LINK]

Mark Sanchez spoke to us about his dream date, groupies and crying. [LINK]

And From The Complex Network:
Nah Right: Birdman says he’d kiss Lil Wayne again. [LINK]

Nice Kicks: The Rejuven8 is coming back. [LINK]

Bastardly: Bar Refaeli is wet in a bikini. [LINK]

Das Gamer: Check out the first trailer for Madden NFL 10. [LINK]

Kicks On Fire: This Jordan V pack is sick. [LINK]

On Smash: Fabolous goes beat hunting with Sean C & LV. [LINK]

It wasn’t too long ago that Heidi was the fresh-faced, down-to-earth chick on The Hills, but boy have times changed. Like one of those crystal-meth before/after pictures, Heidi-then and Heidi-now is like a cautionary tale on what can become of impressionable young women in Hollywood. Through it all—the horrible music, the pinhead husband, the porn titties—one thing has never changed: We’d still beat. And on that note, to celebrate her best week ever, we salute Heidi Montag’ best breast moments…

#5: FAUX-BAYWATCH PHOTOSHOOT, 2008


[Click On The Image To View The Full Body Shot]

KEEP CLICKING NEXT TO SEE MORE OF HEIDI’S TWOS…

If you ever wondered what dishes might kill you, here's a list of 15 to stay away from. [Asylum]

Check out this review of Tecmo Bowl Kickoff via an iChat conversation. [Das Gamer]

Denise Milani is guaranteed to brighten up your day. [Flisted]

T.I checks in with Howard Stern. Listen to it here. [Nah Right]

Young Jeezy put on for the Jimmy Kimmel show. [Nah Right]

Star Trak x The LoveBoat? It could happen.[Double Viking]

Cop some new Incase and keep your computer tight while in roam. [Daily Drop]

Get ready to put your Axis killin’ shoes on this November. [Das Gamer]

Check out Kanye's third “Flashing Lights” video. [Nah Right]

Avery Johnson is getting back on his grizzy by slinging whips. [Dead Spin]

Amongst Friends' summer line is solid. [CtotheJL]

We'll be drunk dialing next winter with this glovephone. [Nikola Design]

Yo, yo, I got Heidiwood/I'm wearing it all day/I like it, so what do you got to say/You got Apple Bottoms, what/You know what's going up/Um, keep going, I'll keep flowing/You know what I like to say/Everyday, I'm in New York/It's all good this way.”

Watch the video of MC Montagulous after the jump.

Related: Is Audrina Patridge The Hills’ Biggest Loser?

[Just Jared]