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The History of Celebrity Sex Addiction

“Are we cuttin’ or what?”

After watching him play a sex-crazed writer on Californication so convincingly, it should come as no surprise that David Duchovny recently hit rehab for his real-life sex addiction.

According to an old Dateline report, over 16 million men and women suffer from sex addiction, yet celebs seem to be the most at-risk population. But really, though: wouldn’t any man with money, fame, and unlimited access to bangable chicks become addicted to sex at some point? We did a little research, and found this fascinating tidbit: “Pornography, combined with regular masturbation, is the cornerstone for most sex addicts.” Fuck! Even us regular Joe’s may be in trouble.

Far be it from us to make light of celebrity missteps, but we’ve compiled a list of famous sex addicts—not for us to laugh at, but for us to learn from. Pay attention.

Click here to see Hollywood’s biggest sex fiends and the women they left behind…

Wanted Hits The Target

Wanted could easily inspire an office shooting. Ayo! Scott means that as a compliment—not that he promotes that sort of thing (unless your boss is the type of asshole to keep you late on a Friday).

Based loosely on Mark Millar and J.G. Jones’s comic series, Wanted tells the story of cubicle-bound schmuck Wesley Gibson (James McAvoy), who hates himself because he constantly takes shit from everyone in his life and does nothing about it. Then he meets Fox (Angelina Jolie), a sexy, gun-toting assassin who introduces him to a secret society of shooters that his estranged father once belonged to. Soon he realizes he’s a born killer and escapes his old life as a professional pussy to pop off shots like Peter North.

As summer blockbusters go, Wanted hits the target with bare-assed Angelina and a visual redefinition of busting off on someone’s dome. It also pulls some conspicuous jack moves on Fight Club and The Matrix, but hey, you could steal from much shittier movies (and it’s not like the comic, which stole Eminem and Halle Berry’s likenesses was theft-free). The message here is just as important as it was the first couple times around: No matter how low you are, a gun can always make things better. So grab yourself a hand cannon and have yourself a blast. Check out the trailer and Complex’s three-minute reenactment after the jump.

Halle Berry Looks Healthy

Halle Berry re-introduced herself, and her twins. [Egotastic]

Gary Coleman still has serious issues. [The Superficial]

Playing chess with Lego’s is the way to go. [Like Cool]

Ronaldo’s getting his own dunk, hooked up in Brazilian colors. Pele would be proud. [Nice Kicks]

If you’re seriously watching your weight, cop this Seiko Slimstick. [Ohgizmo]

Winding Down: Holy Halle Berry

Monday’s wouldn’t suck so much if we could wake up next to Halle Berry. [Holy Taco]

Forget Pap and Joey Crack, what goth-rocker do you think would body the other, Marilyn Manson or Trent Reznor?
[DoubleViking]

Ugh. Madonna was much hotter when Dennis Rodman was bedding her. Check her new album cover. [Weakgame]

Some things remain a constant on Spring Break trips, mainly girls getting retarded drunk and some a-hole with a point and shoot taking advantage. [CoedMagazine]

The Irish frat-boys are going to go nuts over this beer-pong table. St. Patty’s day all year long! [TheBachelorGuy]

Think you’re tough? Lets see if you have the stones to take part in the five manliest sports on the planet. [Justaguything]