Sports
Matt Leinart Can’t Score Like Brady On Or Off The Field
Imagine you’re a Heisman-winning, first-round pick, starting NFL quarterback. Now imagine Nick Lachey calls you up about a bitchin’ kegger with some slightly doughy Arizona State nursing students. Any alarms gone off yet? Word class athleticism and a $51-million contract should snag you Gisele, or at least the entire female cast of The Hills with a stripper chaser. Yet Matt Leinart settles for a five-some of college girls in a jacuzzi while Lachey rallies up a game of beer pong. At least Matt can look forward to training camp, bouncing back from a season-ending injury, and leading an 8-8 team that hasn’t won a playoff game since 1984.
We heard that LeBron was going to be the third dude to land on the cover of Vogue so we made it a point to check it out. And lo and behold: Holy King Kong! Why not just replace the basketball with a tiny helicopter, Photoshop an expression of abject terror on Gisele’s face, and call it a day? If that was Tom Brady, they’d have him in a Brioni suit with some Ferragamos on. Open letter to Klanna Wintour: even though it’s rumored you 
