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Diddy exploded on a hip-hop cop outside of NYC’s 1 Oak after the VMAs. [Nah Right]

If you’re a pothead, here are some career options you may want to consider. [Coed Mag]

Why not? Check this gallery of hot Taylor Swift pics. Ha. [Holy Taco]

Harry Potter fan or or not, this Universal Studios attractions looks sick. [PopCrunch]

Warning: you will end up looking pics of these hotties for a while. [Double Viking]

Nudity, alcohol, and violence. This sounds like one hell of a plane ride. [Flisted]

From what we remember, there was an outcry the first time Diddy picked up the microphone to spit a verse instead of just doing ad-libs. Of course, he wound up giving us a decent amount of classic material over the years and some of the complaints settled. Now the artist currently known as Ciroc Obama is a full-blown, Auto-Tune using singer releasing records under the Dirty Money moniker (along with Dawn Richard formerly of Danity Kane, and songwriter Kaleena).

We’re not completely counting out the upcoming Last Train To Paris album, but this record leaves us feeling a little iffy about the entire project, no matter how great the Hype Williams directed video looks. We thought Mr. Combs told us that he wouldn’t stop, but the excessive use of pitch correction software and recycled Biggie verses almost makes us wish that he would.

Tune in to Complex.com every morning at 8 AM for your daily “Wake N’ Watch” video.

Today we’re hitting you with an unlikely dubstep collaboration, a hilarious take on one of the week’s hottest leaks, and a few more jams guaranteed to keep your playlists fresh. Listen to our latest Shuffle choices and download them immediately after below…

SONG: “Broken Safety”
ARTIST: Raekwon f/ Jadakiss, Styles P
DOWNLOAD: [LINK]
• Short but effective banger from one of this week’s biggest rap album leaks. Everyone rips it. A triangle offense everyone has been waiting for.

SONG: “Love Come Down”
ARTIST: Dirty Money
DOWNLOAD: [LINK]
• This record from Diddy’s new Dirty Money group (himself, Dawn Richard, Kaleena) fits right in with the generic hip-hop/R&B he’s been making for years. We’re just brave enough to admit that there’s nothing wrong with it…sometimes.

SONG: “Talamak”
ARTIST: Toro Y Moi
DOWNLOAD: [LINK]
• Another indie kid getting buzz out of nowhere. The South Carolina native is actually homies with Washed Out from yesterday’s Shuffle, but we think his track goes a little harder.

SONG: “Hate (DJ Aziz Ansari Exclusive)”
ARTIST: Jay-Z f/ Kanye West
DOWNLOAD: [LINK]
• You’ve probably played the original to death since Blueprint 3 leaked, but this version will make you understand why we’ve ranked Aziz Ansari’s funniest moments.

SONG: “So What”
ARTIST: Xzibit f/ U-N-I
DOWNLOAD: [LINK]
• We knew the dubstep sound would be making its way to hip-hop sooner than later, but we never thought Mr. Pimp My Ride would be ushering it in. The thing is, we’re not mad at this at all.

Visit Complex.com every day at 5 PM for your daily “5 O’Clock Shuffle“ playlist.

Two-time Complex cover model Cassie keeps it right and keeps it tight. We of course refer to the right side of her head, which she recently shaved for either self-expression or, according to rapper and celebrity hairstyle expert Fabolous, cheap publicity. The look isn’t for everyone, and neither is Cassie. Word on the gossiping-ass streets is that she and her boyfriend, entertainment mogul Sean “Diddy” Combs, are crazy in love and may soon marry.

Personally, Complex would hate to have her legally off the market, but if Puff makes her happy, damn him, er, so be it. But before dude pops the question, we had to put our homegirl to the wifey/trifey test to see if she really is marriage material. Here’s to hoping she’s not—until she realizes she’s meant to be with us, that is. Hit the jump to read the wife/trife evidence and to cast your vote…


WIFEY
We love a woman who’ll spontaneously shave. Especially if she’s willing to wear a schoolgirl outfit.

TRIFEY?
Her single “Official Girl” was about a “fictional” side piece who wants to be wifed up. It definitely had nothing to do with rumors that Cassie was mic-checking her current boyfriend Diddy while he was still married to Kim Porter.

CLICK NEXT SEE MORE EVIDENCE (AND MORE PICS OF CASSIE!)

Unfortunately it seems KiD CuDi'a personal fav of Complex'is not yet comfortable with this. In an interview with rapradar.com CuDi proposes beating the ass of our writer as an appropriate response to our gentle ribbing (we felt like turning his blog Stans against us was enough, but whatever…). Thankfully, CuDi explains he’d never stoop to violence (phew!), though others would (uh oh!). While we appreciate the warning, CuDi should know that most of the Complex staff has been writing about hip hop since the pre-blogging days, when writers had to interact with their subjects in the flesh. So we’re well aware of what happens when rappers get frustrated at people who own both opinions and computers. For all those who aren’t, lets take a stroll down memory lane with a history of Rappers Who’ve Physically Threatened Violence On The Media…

• Wu-Tang Clan vs. RapPages
• Year: 1994
• What Happened? Esteemed rap scribbla Cheo H. Coker penned a profile of the Shaolin soldiers for the beloved but defunct RapPages –problem was, the accompanying illustrations (visible here, here, here and here) didn’t sit well with the group. So when Coker got back with the crew for another interview, Masta Killa, not yet a core member of the Clan, worked out an exchange: you give me your tape recorder, I punch you in the fuckin’ mouf (Coker’s account of the madness is here).
• …And The Winner Is? Masta Killa is now official Wu-Tang Banga. Coker is now official Notorious co-writer. Stapleton vs. Hollywood, big bank take little bank. We’re going with Coker on this one.

• Cypress Hill vs. The Source
• Year: 1994
• What Happened? On page 42 of their January “Best of 1993″ issue, someone at the Source (before they became Almighty RSO Monthly) threw a couple of easy darts at the Hill on a parody news page–provoking a volley of phoned-in death threats from alleged Soul Assassins compadres (hopefully not you, Eric Bobo!). Read the jokes for yourselves…

• …And The Winner Is? B-Real is still active, if underappreciated (3,828 first-week copies sold? Wake up, youngsters!). The Source is still active, if a shell of its former self. The real winner? Marijuana!

Click NEXT to read about Almighty RSO vs. The Source and Russell Simmons vs. Vibe…

Sometimes, though, the banality can get a bit much. Like, say, when you decide to tell your fans that you’re joining Jay Electronica in a “spiritual fast” that requires you to drink only “natural juices” for 48 hours. We’ll give Puff props for putting himself out there, but we realize that not all of you are following him on Twitter, so we decided to break down the colossally significant event for you*, our loyal readers…

iamdiddy ok diddy’s twiddies the fast is officially on lets go!!!

iamdiddy I know I’m not! Fuck a fast let’s go!!! LAST TRAIN TO PARIS COMING AS SOON AS I CAN STOP SHI**ING Y’ALL!!!!

*NOTE: This twitter conversation is a parody that was created by the Complex staff. Read Diddy’s twitter for the real deal.

Believe it or not, life wasn’t always money, menages and movie reviews for Ayo! Scott. Growing up in Brooklyn, Ayo! felt ugly (on the inside). He was a dick but didn’t know how to make the assholes around him like that about him. Then one day he heard Christopher “The Notorious B.I.G.” Wallace rap about being “black and ugly as ever,” and still making girls piss themselves ’cause they were so excited to see him. From that day on, Ayo! resolved to love himself and let people come around whenever they realized the inherent value of a big prick. And here you are reading his review of the Biggie biopic Notorious, absolutely loving him for being such a cock! [Ayo! nods knowingly.]

Like the rest of BK, Ayo! will always love Big Poppa, so when rumors of Notorious surfaced, he feared it would dishonor the legendary homegrown rapper on some Get Rich Or Die Trying dog shit. When he finally saw the film, he exhaled. (Then he put down his blunt and breathed a little easier, too.) Produced by Big’s mom, Voletta Wallace, and Puff Daddy, with input from many other people who were there with Brooklyn’s finest, the movie gives some insider perspective on his rise from ashy drug dealer to classy rap phenom and fallen star. Along the way, it hits all the right notes for heads like Ayo! who remember NYC and its 1992-1997 rap soundtrack fondly while fondling themselves late at night.

Jamal “Gravy” Woolard, a Brooklyn rapper whose biggest achievement prior to landing this movie was allegedly having his man shoot him in the ass before a Hot 97 radio interview to thug out some headlines, plays Biggie. Though he had no acting pedigree, Woolard took his opportunity and waddled with it. Other than Big’s lazy eye, which couldn’t be achieved without prosthetics that would have damaged dude’s eyesight, everything else from head cock (…) to the husky voice and cadence is spot on. Looks aside, he pulls off the emotion of a man who pulls himself up out of the struggle only to discover that mo’ money breeds mo’ problems. Although Ayo!, like most folks walking this earth, doesn’t listen to Gravy’s music, he hopes that Woolard is able to keep eating off acting (though he should probably stick to salads, unless there are a lot of other roles out there that call for actors to balloon up to 350 pounds).

As for the rest of the cast, Angela Bassett blesses the role of Voletta; Derek Luke, who portrays Puff, may actually Harlem Shake better than Diddy; Naturi Naughton reveals her tremendous talent (and her tremendously taleneted twos) playing Big’s jumpoff-turned-artist Lil’ Kim. On the flip side, Tupac Shakur “fanatic” Anthony Mackie plays himself playing Pac and Marc John Jeffries makes Big’s weed carrier Lil Cease seem like an elementary school midget (which may actually be a brilliant turn, now that Ayo! thinks about it).

Though you know the tragic ending and have listened to the music a million times, it’s ultimately quite moving to grab a 40 and a blunt and spend a couple hours with Big reminiscing on his life before death. R.I.P. B.I.G.

(BK, Ayo! will see you at the theater. Please don’t shoot him.)

Diddy Biggie blog! Ciroc Obama talks about Notorious. [Nah Right]

Brooklyn Dom designs a colorful Dunk SB for Brooklyn Projects. BK we go hard! [Nice Kicks]

Even if you don’t do acid, this video will trip you out. [Double Viking]

Seriously we hate Bluetooths, but this cell-phone holder is the lesser of two evils. [Like Cool]

The contest, which you can enter here, is open to “overachievers, superstars, hustlers, ballers, fathers, brothers, and mothers,” and asks people to upload videos of themselves conveying to the world why “they are Kings,” in their own worlds. Once all the submissions are in (the contest ends January 25th) Puff will hand-pick his favorite three and fly them to NYC for an all expense paid experience, where they'll be treated like, umm, kings. Check out the competition’s video announcement from Ciroc Obama himself below…

But what makes Notorious so watchable? Let us count down the reasons why…

5. DEREK LUKE’S UTTER MASTERY OF THE DIDDY BOP.

Luke’s performance as Diddy is less about impersonation and more of an embodiment of the Puff persona. That basically means, Luke doesn’t really look, talk or act exactly like Puffy, but he still manages to deliver an effective portrayal. However, the one thing that Luke has down pat are Puffy’s exaggerated dance moves. Shit, Luke diddy bops better than Diddy! We couldn’t help but laugh every time Luke-as-Puffy jigs across the stage in the movie. You will, too.
——————————————————————————

4. THIS DUDE IS LIL’ CEASE? REALLY???

The portrayals in Notorious range from really good (Angela Bassett as Voletta Wallace) to really bad (Anthony Mackie as 2Pac), but one stands out above them all'Marc John Jeffries as Biggie’s sidekick Lil’ Cease. We can’t imagine Cease will be too pleased to see himself played by lil’ dude from Brown Sugar with the Chiclet teeth. He smokes more blunts than a little bit and got mad guns up in the cabin? C’mon fam: He looks about as hard as a velour bathrobe. Jeffries is not a bad actor by any means, but in a film full of spot-on performances, his Lil’ Cease is comically inaccurate. You’ll still enjoy it, though, because it’s that bad.
——————————————————————————
3. BAD BOY GOT MAD HITS. MAD HITS.

Y’all musta forgot! Notorious will definitely compel you to go back and cue up the Big library in the iPod'especially since you’ll be wanting to hear the real deal, not the Gravy-as-Big movie versions. Either way, the film is full of Biggie classics, as well as other Bad Boy hits (”You Used to Love Me,” by Faith'fire!). It will make even the staunchest backpacker a little nostalgic about Bad Boy’s reign at the top. And there’s not even a Ma$e in the movie!

CLICK NEXT to see the 2 biggest reasons!

T.I talks about working with Kanye, Luda and responds to Jim Jones calling out his swag. [Rhapsody]

Starks drops a new “trail” pack of laces just in time for changing leaves. [Ctothejl]

In case you missed Diddy shit on Aubrey last night and kicked her out the group, check this video. [Flisted]

The homie Chris Vidal made an appearance on Spike TV to talk…yup you guessed it, sneakers. [Nice Kicks]

Diddy's new Ciroc ad channels Frank Sinatra. [Nah Right]

Check out this look back on the best signature b-ball shoes from 1998-2008. [Nice Kicks]

Here comes controversy; check out the new video for LittleBigPlanet. [Das Gamer]

Busty bartender babes? Sure. [CoedMag]

Perhaps it’s a sign of web video overload that the release of last week’s hilariously awful Garner Fructis shampoo ad with Memphis Bleek went largely unnoticed'either that, or Bleek really is that irrelevant these days.

But in his defense, you can’t really eat off the rap game any more. And besides, Memph man is far from the first rapper to embarrass himself while endorsing a product (he is the first MC to shill for women’s shampoo, so throw up the Roc for that). We went deep into the archives to dig up the worst-ever ads featuring rappers. See our cringe-inducing collection, as well as Bleek’s awesome ad, below

RAPPER: THE FAT BOYS
PRODUCT: SWATCH
YEAR: 1985

Funny how our oldest ad is probably the least offensive. It’s also funny how the “stiff=white; fun=black” tropes haven’t changed much over the last 20 years.

RAPPER: KID ‘N PLAY
PRODUCT: SPRITE
YEAR: 1991

All we can say is: Damn, these muthafuckas are hyped for some muthafuckin’ Sprite. Give ‘em a two-liter bottle, they’re liable to start French-kissing each other.

RAPPER: MC HAMMER
PRODUCT: KFC POPCORN CHICKEN
YEAR: 1992

Seriously, who directed this ad? David Duke?

RAPPER: CHICKEN MCNUGGETS
PRODUCT: MCDONALD’S
YEAR: EARLY ‘90S

Damn, never thought we’d see the day. Those McNuggets fucking sold out, big-time.

RAPPER: REDMAN
PRODUCT: KARL KANI
YEAR: MID ‘90S

This is actually dope'we just wanted to put an example of a rapper ad done right. “Old folks put a ‘K’ on their pacemaker.” Props also go to the St. Ides collection and the mid-’90s Sprite classics.

RAPPER: SIR MIX-A-LOT
PRODUCT: TARGET
YEAR: 2005

Just goes to show that you can live off one gimmick song for the rest of your life. In other words, get ready for a “Super Glue that hooooooole” ad in about 20 years.

RAPPER: FAT JOE
PRODUCT: EASTERN MOTORS
YEAR: 2006

Here’s the equivalent of George Clooney doing a TV ad in Japan. Don’t think we weren’t gonna find this, Joey! We actually have mad love for Eastern Motors and their awesome jingle. This is worth a look for Joe’s awesome acting skills.

RAPPER: DIDDY
PRODUCT: SEAN JOHN UNFORGIVABLE COLOGNE
YEAR: 2007

What’s worse: (1) how seriously Diddy takes himself in his cologne ads, or (2) how flagrantly Ryan Leslie has swagger-jacked Puff’s whole steez. We’ll go with number two.

RAPPER: KANYE WEST
PRODUCT: ABSOLUT VODKA
YEAR: 2008

This shit is so aggressively “hip” that it’s aggressively wack. You know this ad took the brainpower of 16 white people in khaki pants, along with two “urban” kids hired to consult them. Viral our ass!

RAPPER: MEMPHIS BLEEK
PRODUCT: GARNIER FRUCTIS
YEAR: 2008

Bleek can’t be struggling for money (Hov!), so we wonder how this collabo was born. Our best guess is that Bleek was drunk and high at a club and unwittingly signed on as some balding ad exec pitched him while dancing awkwardly to “Big Pimpin.’” Something like that.

His new VH1 show'I Want To Work For Diddy, which premieres tonight at 9 P.M. on VH1'promises to be no different. To prepare, we remembered Diddy’s top reality show moments below.

DIDDY FORCES “DA BAND” TO FETCH HIM CHEESECAKE
Making The Band 2 (Season 2)

Diddy set the tone early with this infamous episode. In an ironic twist, Babs and Ness now clean the bathrooms at Junior’s. Full circle!

DAVE CHAPPELLE ETHERS DYLAN Chappelle’s Show (Season 2)

Diddy took a lot of humorous pot shots at Dylan during the season, but Chappelle straight buried him in his parody of MTB. Merciless.

DIDDY COINS “BITCHASSNESS” Making The Band 4 (Season 2)

OK, the T-shirts were a little much, but you can’t front on the awesomeness of the phrase (and Diddy’s verbal dressing down of the Day 26 lames).

LAURIEANN GIBSON ETHERS HERSELF Making The Band 4 (Season 1)

We couldn’t locate the classic clip of Diddy cursing out former MTB choreographer Laurieann Gibson, but we did locate Gibson’s music video…yeah, she’s trying to do her own thing now. MUST BE SEEN TO BE BELIEVED.

I WANT TO WORK FOR DIDDY TRAILER

That first contestant? Man, we really hope he/she wins.

Although he's been in a decade-long relationship with the ultimate ride-or-die chick'ex-model and mother of three of his children, Kim Porter'Diddy’s been known to flagrantly dip off with shorties whenever he pleased. Rumors have been flying for months that Diddy was spending a little too much time with Cassie, his label's young diva. The latest gossip is that Puff got on bended knee to make the 21-year-old his official girl'for real for real. If this is true, then Kim will once again be left out in the cold. Is Diddy really making the right choice? After the jump, we pit the two ladies head-to-head and weigh in on Diddy's decision.

LOOKS:
Cassie: Simply put, shawty right there is a 10.
Kim : Don’t get us wrong, Kim ain’t no buttherface'she’s definitely a cougar, but it’s hard to fuck with the flawlessness of Cassie’s flawless feminine features. Flawless.

WINNER: Cassie

TALENT:
Cassie: After her first single “Me & U” showed that homegirl had the vocal range of a cucumber, we thought she was gonna pack it up, move back to Connecticut, and resume modeling. But, even though her pipe game’s not too tough, homegirl’s proven herself a hustler by popping up on a number of tracks. She even got Weezy on her newest single.

Kim: This Columbia, Georgia native moved to ATL after high school to pursue her modeling career. Those dreams got put on hold once she met met Al B. Sure at the height of his success and popped out his seed. She was also briefly in a girl group called Girl 6. It appears as if her main talent is getting knocked up by entertainers with curly hair.

WINNER:  Cassie

LOYALTY
Cassie: She’s only been on Bad Boy for about three years (which is the normal life span for most of Diddy’s artists), so we’ve yet to see if she’s gonna try to make a break for it when (sorry, we mean if) her next album flops.

Kim: Without tying the knot, she’s been with Diddy for 10 years, popped out three kids for him, and stood in the wings as he took J. Lo to award shows and snuggled up with Sienna Miller in Europe. That’s what we call a bottom chick.

WINNER: Kim

PAST RELATIONSHIPS
Cassie: Before being linked to Diddy, Cassie and singer/songwriter/douchebag Ryan Leslie were rumored to be an item. RLes, as he calls himself, is a mega-talented dude. But come on, dude calls himself RLes.

Kim: Kim’s other baby father is none other than '80’s R&B singer Al B. Sure. Yeah, his name’s hella corny and kids today may think he’s wack, but this guy had three top 10 albums and a whole generation of women in heat.

WINNER: Kim

EFFECT ON PUBLIC IMAGE
Cassie: Dating girls half your age'let alone marrying them'ain’t the business. It seems as if homie waited until she was 21 to really go in. Not cool, Diddy.

Kim: She’s been there for him for a damn decade and they have kids together, so if Diddy decided to stay with Ms. Porter, the entire YBF world would think much more highly of him. And she’s actually his age.

WINNER: Kim

VERDICT: Cassie may be PYT of the year, but when it comes to Diddy settling down and getting his grown man on, we’re gonna have to rock with Kim Porter. Some says she’s a gold digger, but she’s the mother of his kids and a cougar. What else do you need, Diddy?

Ellen and Diddy throw down some shots of Vodka. [NahRight]

Check out this limited edition Muska Skytop. [High Snobiety]

These humans are setting back their nationalities with every on-camera moment. [Holy Taco]

Happy Cinco de Mayo from Jessica Alba4! [DoubleViking]

[Source]