Booze R.I.P. Zima: The Greatest Chick Drinks of All Time

Today’s stock tip: Buy Ernest & Julio Gallo Winery shares. Why go for jug wine stocks today, you ask? Well, Gallo makes Boone’s Farm wines, and with the news yesterday that the famed malternative (yes, it’s called that in the press release) beverage Zima was being discontinued, there’s suddenly a huge void in the liquor-drinks-for-young-girls market.

Okay, “huge void” may be overstating things just a tad; truth is, we didn’t even know they still made Zima these days. Still, Zima brings back lots of memories'hanging with young chicks, plying them with alcohol that tasted like soda and then…well, suffice it to say our memories are probably clearer than theirs (it was only last Friday, after all). In remembrance of the Z, we pour a little on the ground and rate the greatest chick drinks of all time below…