Wig Game Improper: The Worst Men’s Haircuts In R&B

When Omarion’s new video dropped the other day, people hardly seemed to care that it was the song was more than a little reminiscent of Mario’s “Break Up”—nope, they were too busy trying to figure out what was really happening with the back of dude’s head. And it’s official: there’s an eyesore where his hair used to be (it’s so cold, it’s so cold, it’s so cold…). Shag action + LA logo = brand-new candidate for worst R&B haircut of the year!

The thing is, O’s bad idea isn’t even a lock for the award. Nope, R&B dudes have spent the past couple of years steadily one-upping each other with horrible domes (ayo2K!). Don’t believe us? Read on…then print it out, take it to the barber shop, and let ’em know: “ANYTHING but this.”

OMARION
Oh, good, now we can finally have an uninterrupted view of what his barber calls the “You Got Served…A Shit Sandwich.”

OMARION BONUS!
Wait, we went to college with that dude. Last time we saw him, he was at a Palestinian Rights rally wearing motorcycle boots in 90-degree weather and gazing soulfully at chicks with leg hair.

R. KELLY
Gold jewelry, gold overcoat, gold braids. Where does it end, gold showers? Wait, don’t answer that.

BOBBY VALENTINO
Gentlemen of Leisure S-curl? Check. Faded sides? Check. 1984 prom picture look complete? Check. How can such a tiny man be so sensual?

BOBBY VALENTINO BONUS!
Attention fans of this look: only available with limited-edition Number Asshole clippers.

LLOYD
Hey, isn’t that Yanni?

LLOYD BONUS!
Nah, our bad. That’s just an ugly chick who looks kinda like Yanni.

AVERY STORM
Congratulations, Avery—you’re the first person to out-porn-actor Pitbull!

QUE FROM DAY 26
What’s so bad about a high, tight fade? What’s that? It’s not a fade? It just looks that way because the side of his head are dyed platinum blonde? Well, in that case, please shoot us in the head.

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