5 Rappers Who Should Sign To Cash Money Records
Cash Money is an army, better yet…an army made up of washed-up recruits. Earlier this week, Bow Wow shocked the rap world when he announced that he has signed a new deal with Baby and Slim’s iconic New Orleans label. And a few months ago, Philly rapper Freeway also announced that he has inked a deal with CMR. Who’s next?
Since the label has started inviting refugees from other labels to join its roster, we decided to suggest some other artists in need of a career boost who could benefit from getting down with Cash Money. Check out the fake album covers and details behind our proposed projects below…
ARTIST: LL Cool J
CASH MONEY DEBUT: Baby Said Knock You Out
THE PITCH: After failing to go gold for the first time in his career with 2008’s Exit 13, Uncle L is a free agent in need of some serious career counseling. Who better to get him back into fighting shape than Birdman? Please, call it a comeback!
STANDOUT TRACKS: “Purple Syrup In a Styrofoam Cup Getting Drunk By Weezy,” “Tuesday & Thursday (Time To Take My Heart Pills),” “Jingling, Baby” (f/ Birdman’s Balls)
ARTIST: The Game
CASH MONEY DEBUT: 1,000,000 Degreez
THE PITCH: First Juvenile put Cash Money on the map with his album 400 Degreez. Then Weezy threw a subliminal at him with 500 Degreez. Then Juvenile responded with 600 Degreez. And now The Game ups the ante (as he always does), rehashing and name-dropping everything his labelmates did before he joined the team, with even more degreez. A million of ’em!
STANDOUT TRACKS: “I Feel Like Dying, Too!”, “I’m So Whodi,” “One More Blood,” “Slim’s Advocate,” “I Am The Hot Boyz”
CLICK NEXT FOR THREE MORE FUTURE CASH MONEY CLASSICS!
suckitmarshall August 20, 2009 at 5:10 pm
CLASSIC.
G boy August 20, 2009 at 5:48 pm
It was funny until you got to Nas. His sales have remain consistent for 12 years. Put 50 in the next one. His sales dropped 100,000%. You were on a roll until the last one.
Esco's bars August 20, 2009 at 6:07 pm
u jus post it and try so funny ish ! cool
but cool j is legendary goat ten times platinium
but i understand cuz hes free agent…
nas is the greatest lyricst ever
every each time gold too
Hip-Hop 4 Life Bitches! August 20, 2009 at 6:20 pm
They should of put Flavor Flav: Ugly & Thuggin’. I feel you G Boy, they lost it with that Nas one, these magazines love baggin’ on Nas, and for what?
MikeyRibbz August 20, 2009 at 6:43 pm
Pillmatic would be a dope song. Especially if Nas did it.
808 August 20, 2009 at 6:50 pm
JACKASS…… you said ” Pos, Dave and Trugoy ” ….Dave and Trugoy are the same person…. Plug 3 is Maseo +++++++
myschel August 20, 2009 at 7:00 pm
wow. this is the best list ever…hilarious
Josh August 20, 2009 at 8:08 pm
Nas?
Really?
stackbread August 20, 2009 at 9:23 pm
Nas is a legend dosent need cash money to lyrical for them
MK August 20, 2009 at 11:37 pm
The first two are perfect and instant classics. I died after seeing LL’s cover and the description of Game’s was too accurate.
ya maw August 21, 2009 at 1:11 am
Trash… Poo… Liquid shit. You suck horribly at lists. And took so much time with them low brow humor covers. I’m tired of dumb shit in hip hop. Think more next time nigga. There’s lots of shit to get Cash Money and each one of these rappers on. you are a fuck.
sk8 broken August 21, 2009 at 8:49 am
wtf?!
De La Soul?!
come on……
Brickjames August 21, 2009 at 11:57 am
Hilarious… the nas one is fucking funny. Kelis took half…
off-that August 23, 2009 at 9:12 pm
lol kelis aint get shit
cody August 21, 2009 at 1:31 pm
Funny shit. But I dont think Nas is washed up. If they signed Nas that would be nice. Nas would be the best rapper if he stayed consistant.
ssid August 21, 2009 at 6:47 pm
why would you put nas on that list? have you heard his last album? untitled was the sh*t !!
Real Talk August 22, 2009 at 5:54 pm
shit was funny until u got to NAS……..haters on Complex still mad over ETHER. Fucking Jay-Z stans
blackdickwhitman! August 22, 2009 at 8:30 pm
Nas has sucked donkey cock since the second album. God’s Son was eh-mattic. Other than that, straight cabage. I’d rather listen to a Baby solo album.
off-that August 23, 2009 at 9:08 pm
lol i wonder what kind of people wrote this! Yall need to get the fuck on and go listen to some coldplay. Yall dont know shit about rap!
WhatsReallyReal August 24, 2009 at 1:54 am
the dude in coldplay probably knows more about rap than this guy.
roni August 26, 2009 at 4:23 pm
nas that’s disrespect..
cool j that’s disrespect..
game is a bird i can definitely see that happening. the cash money camp is so corny.. for real