Worldwide Wednesday: The 50 Hottest American Women
Hear ye! Hear ye! This Saturday is Independence Day and although America is turning 233, our breasts are still as perky as ever! Today’s Worldwide Wednesday is unlike any other that has come before it because it’s about more than just acknowledging beautiful women—it’s about capturing the American spirit. It’s about things like rejoicing in the freedom to eat greasy fast food until you have to wear Costco sweatpants, or in this case, celebrating the liberty to gawk at scantily-clad women you’ll never be able to sleep with.
So, to honor the Fourth of July, we’ve put together a list of honey dips from all 50 states who not only please the eyes, but also exemplify what it means to be a beautiful woman from the best country in the world. For those of you with short attention spans, you best pop an Adderall ’cause this list is a biggie. As for the rest of you, sit back with a cold sixer from Wisconsin, a bag of something sweet from California, and behold: the hottest women in the United States of America (in alphabetical order, of course)…
ALABAMA: Courtney Cox (Birmingham, AL)
ALL-AMERICAN CRED: We’ve still got nothing but love for the girl that gave us an excuse to watch Friends. After all, Americans did invent the TV sitcom.
ALASKA: Sarah Palin (Wasilla, AK)
ALL-AMERICAN CRED: What’s more American than running for vice-president? If all else fails at least she can fall back on royalty checks.
CLICK NEXT TO SEE THE SEXIEST WOMEN FROM ARIZONA AND ARKANSAS!
jocyn86 July 1, 2009 at 5:45 pm
The Union shit was hilarious
BoBtheBuilder July 1, 2009 at 8:18 pm
damn this post is a heatrock – who woulda thought olivia munn is from oklahoma or megan fox was from tennesee
maxwell July 1, 2009 at 9:25 pm
tera patrick is a fuckdoll hahaha
Mike L July 1, 2009 at 11:22 pm
You guys seriously messed up Oregon. Sara Underwood is way hotter then Holly Madison.
E July 1, 2009 at 11:58 pm
AMEN
sara underwood beats holly madison any day
Nick July 2, 2009 at 2:17 am
“…most exciting thing to happen to Iowa since the potato harvester”
Learn your facts; Iowa grows corn, not potatoes! Potatoes belong to Idaho.
Gator July 7, 2009 at 4:57 am
I’m more concerned about the farmer’s daughter than what’s growing on the farm.
Torre July 2, 2009 at 3:37 pm
To NOT have Jessica Alba on here is simply ridiculous!
Phil July 2, 2009 at 6:41 pm
Couldn’t agree more..as hot as Marisa Miller is, no way does she top Jay-Eh.
Jessica Alba is the hottest girl on the planet…it’s even said so in the movies
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0486576/quotes
FallenRawToast July 2, 2009 at 6:50 pm
So bumping Marisa Miller who is far hotter than the hot Jessica Alba? I think not
JIM July 2, 2009 at 7:27 pm
EVAN RAQUEL WOOD, BEYONCE AND THE UGLY FAT ASS CHICK FROM SOUTH CAROLINA SHOULD NOT BE ON THIS LIST!!!!!!
Davey boy smith July 3, 2009 at 11:13 am
Hey!!!
Who said Americans invented the TV Sitcom (see Courtney Cox)? I beg to differ! Surely it was us good Brits? (I might be wrong… I haven’t checked… worth a go). For an equally hot (and unfortunately recently departed) TV sitcom babe check out Mollie Sugden of ‘Are you being Served’ fame. Hubba Hubba!
Ted July 3, 2009 at 11:58 am
the tennison twins beat the wrestling freak any day in idaho
Bobby July 3, 2009 at 12:25 pm
We grow corn in Iowa, not potatoes moron.
Brian July 3, 2009 at 5:40 pm
This list is AWFUL! Michigan and SC are both horrible picks just for starters! They got a few right, but waaaaaaay too many misses.
Jon-Michael July 3, 2009 at 6:33 pm
Tara Conner over Ashley Judd? That’s the biggest snafu. As for my home state of Texas, I’d take Amber Heard. She’s young and hot and not a diva.
maxwell July 3, 2009 at 9:51 pm
lets dispel some of the rumors. 1) while iowa grows mostly corn to say that there are no potato crops is sheer idiocy. served. 2) usa invented tv sitcom (see i love lucy, i dream of genie etc) 3) fuck all you haters this list is bomb and full of hot chicks so go fuck yourselves haters
jeremy July 3, 2009 at 11:14 pm
It’s not a rumor, Iowa does not grow potatoes. Number one in corn and soybeans though, plenty of jokes could have been made there.
The Devil July 3, 2009 at 11:57 pm
Pretty good list.
Better than anybody else would’ve done.
Big Jonny July 3, 2009 at 11:57 pm
I still say Jennifer Garner for WV was a huge omission. Amber Heard for TX would be great, but I don’t think I could boot Beyonce
Ced_V1 July 4, 2009 at 6:10 am
i personally believe that they messed up with New York. Scarlett Johansson is way hotter than J-Lo. not to say J-Lo isnt hot, but i think Scarlett would have been a better choice.
Promo1one July 4, 2009 at 6:48 am
mann.. it’s amazing
2Dforlife July 7, 2009 at 12:53 pm
This blogger has no idea what he is doin. Looks like hes had a GF for like 10 years and doesnt rememeber what its like to actually get with a hottie. prob a quire
Eddy July 8, 2009 at 10:47 am
this list is f-ed up
i mean jessica alba isnt even on the list, way hotter than marisa miller and there were some fat chicks. TRY MAKING A BETTER LIST NEXT TIME
steve July 9, 2009 at 1:29 pm
why is jenna fisher’s photo all pixelated?!
Wyo July 13, 2009 at 1:30 pm
“nothing going on in Wyoming ? ” Bullshit. You should’ve asked me for a few pix of our local Wyoming babes before you make a stupid comment about something you obviously know nothing about. Should I send the cowboys, the bikers, or the roughnecks to educate you ?
andrew September 2, 2009 at 4:33 pm
I agree with previous people
Sarah Jean Underwood IS Oregon
Scarlett Johansson is everything New York has Tig ol Bitties on a Jewish girl.
OHIO/CHICAGO! October 11, 2009 at 8:21 pm
rightOn.
SATISFIED October 22, 2009 at 7:11 pm
Thought the list was good. I only really cared about 2 stated, New York and Maryland. PERFECT PICS!