Wifey or Trifey: Mary-Louise Parker

Nobody could have argued that Mary-Louise Parker had wifey status a few years ago—she was a hot and experienced woman (read: cougar) with a legit acting career who stayed free of tabloid fuckery. We felt for her (but secretly celebrated) when Billy Crudup left her pregnant and lonely in 2004, and the following year we fell in love with her portrayal on Weeds of a single mother struggling to survive in the streets (of the burbs). Through it all, we kept hoping the real-life Mary-Louise would finally get a chance to settle down with someone special…like us.

Then she started showing her nips in practically every episode and we started to wonder if MLP had let her new role get to her head. Has her wifey appeal gone up in smoke? In honor of the premiere of the fifth season of Weeds tonight, we decided to take a good long look at its leading lady. See the evidence and vote below…


WIFEY? Mary L. is a true friend of Mary J.
Have you ever had sex with Mary-Louise Parker…on weed?

TRIFEY? Her character on Weeds scares us a little .
Nancy rats out her man, sets fire to her house, and forgets about her two sons so often that one attempts to get her attention by masturbating to her photos, while the other dope-deals on the side. We’ve seen enough rappers get locked up to know that the life-imitating-art shit is not a game.