Complex Casting Call: Reality Show ‘Geeks’
It looks like MTV is picking up the reality show/Kutchfest known as Beauty and the Geek, which they will allegedly be remaking with a new “celebrity” angle. That’s cool, even though it’s more than a little predictable: get a bunch of IT professionals and Weird Al fans, then drop in a party-vanload of MySpace-famous SEC coeds and Entourage guest stars, and watch the ensuing cavalcade of alpha-male transformations and warm-fuzzy changes of heart.
That’s why we suggest flipping it the other way: make the geeks famous, and then watch as civilian women struggle with choosing between tertiary fame-by-association and..their natural instincts. Now that’s entertainment! Check out our round up of 5 sure-fire celebrity geek casting choices…
KANYE WEST
• Geek Status: Horrible taste in glasses, underbite (geek demerits for having it be the result of a horrific car accident rather than just needing orthodontia)
• Ideal Beauty: Judging from his lyrics and taste in porn, a bisexual blonde chick with giant titties. Also, given his legendary self-obsession, having no opinions and being made of mirrored glass would help.
MARK ZUCKERBERG
• Geek Status: Founded Facebook, third-grade haircut
• Ideal Beauty: Beautiful, brainy, familiar with computers'gotta go with a classic. Or, even better, our version.
CLIFF BLEZSINSKI
• Geek Status: Invented Gears of War, doesn’t realize the social repercussions of posing with a chainsaw gun he invented.
• Ideal Beauty: Let’s see, someone not turned off by a near-psychotic fixation with massacres…oh! Squeaky Fromme? At least she can’t run away…
NATE SILVER
• Geek Status: Thanks to his groundbreaking stat work with both Baseball Prospectus and his political site fivethirtyeight.com, has become a god both among sabermetrics geeks and rabid MSNBC viewers. Also, frumpy quasi-academic attire.
• Ideal Beauty: Rachel Maddow. But maybe, y’know, into guys.
MASI OKA
• Geek Status: Ivy League grad (and computer science major!), Asian. Don’t front, that’s automatic points! Unless you’re Steve Aoki, in which case you’re just a dirtbag.
• Ideal Beauty: For his sake, we vote for a threesome with Kristen Bell and Hayden Panettiere. It’s cool, we don’t mind him taking our sloppy seconds.
