When Former Child Starlets Discover Drugs

Big news! Maureen McCormick, better known as the actress who played Marcia Brady on the Brady Bunch, admits to trading sex for cocaine in her new tell-all book. Yay. Guess what honey: you’re not the first chick to become a cokehead and occasionally bang her dealer. Get over yourself.

One good thing to come of this though, is the reminder that impressionable young girls are susceptible to the white arts. Peep our list of 8 other great falls from grace by young actresses who discovered the dark side of “the party”…

DREW BARRYMORE

Drew Barrymore is one of the coolest actor chicks there is, and while her current drug use seems limited to a little weed from time to time, she used to be quite the little party girl. The young Barrymore was a regular at Studio 54, drank when she was 11, and had her first toot of cocaine when she was 12. A suicide attempt at 13 put her into rehab, and while she was a nutso party chick then, she’s turned out just fine. If anything, her return to grace can be a template for when Miley Cyrus goes off the deep end.

JODIE SWEETIN

When your Full House co-stars move on to become filthy rich, disgustingly awesome, or the dude who bangs Rebecca Rojimn, it becomes hard to stand out. Cue the meth addiction. Sweetin is now clean and attempting to make a comeback by filming a reality show with her husband, an idea that seems even worse than hitting the pipe.

BRITNEY SPEARS

Britney started strong with the Mickey Mouse Club, moved into “Hit Me Baby One More Time”, sexy videos like “Toxic” and then that banger VMAs snake performance. Then she dropped KFed, met Paris Hilton, showed everyone her pee hole and allegedy jammed enough cocaine up her nose to earn her a whole wing at Promises Rehab. She’s made progress as of recent but for the most part, she’s still seems like she’s trying to get her shit together.

DANA PLATO

It would be uncouth to tell too many jokes about the dead, so we’ll just say this: Dana Plato loved drugs. So much so that she let them get in the way of her Different Strokes TV gig. From there, the downward spiral picked up steam and she wound up doing all kinds of crazy shit including a softcore porn with the same Different Strokes name before ODing and dying. Like we said, we’re not going to get grimy, but you can Google an image of her with a johnson in her mouth if you really want.

LINDSAY LOHAN

Oh Lohan, with your antics. The heavy-freckled cutie came up strong in The Parent Trap remake and then rocked some shitty movies we all watched just to see that pretty face. We believe that you’re recovered from your drug problem about as much as we believe you’re a lesbian. Even if you’re being serious we’re not gonna listen. Lalalalalalalalalallala. Not listening. lalalalallaalala. Afterparty at the Complex offices, leave Samantha at home.

KEISHA KNIGHT PULLIAM

Apparently “multiple sources” can attest to the fact that Rudy from The Cosby Show is a fan of cocaine. The sources are unconfirmed, of course, but we believe it. Hell, even if we don’t, girl’s looking real good these days.

TATUM O’ NEAL

Tatum O’Neal came up as a child actor in Paper Moon and the original Bad News Bears. She has had a lifelong battle with the white, and poor thing just got caught again this fall when she was researching a new role. Oh, that’s right. What’s the name of that movie about doing coke on the Lower East Side again? I think it comes out around Christmas. Yeah right.

THE OLSEN TWINS

We’re not allowed to say that these two enjoy getting rocked on cocaine. We can’t even say that the pills that Heath Ledger OD’d on came from Ashley to help him calm down from a night of too much partying. Just because they hang out in NYC, date a bunch of rebel dudes and go out a lot doesn’t mean either of them have drug problems. Oh wait, maybe we can.