The Corniest Car-Branded Products

Many people don’t know this, but almost every car company has a retail division that sells branded merchandise. They sling everything from ashtrays to customized GPS systems. And, of course, some companies are much better at hawking these themed products than others. Porsche, for example, has a design arm called Porsche Design that works with a number of different companies to create aesthetically sick and slick products that exude the coolness and exclusiveness of the storied brand.
But then there are the companies who just throw their name on anything regardless of the looks or quality. The tacky Lamborghini branded cigar set pictured above that surfaced today is one of those products. But they’re not the only ones guilty of watering down their brand with cheap merchandise. See below for more shitty auto-spawned products…
LAMBORGHINI FEROCE COLOGNE

If you were really ballin’ enough to buy any Lamborghini, we’re pretty sure you wouldn’t be wearing this. This is obviously for the douchebags who hit South Beach and rent one for the weekend just to ride around shining. Either way, it’s corny. Spend more than $30 and cop yourself some Tom Ford so you smell like you got some damn sense.
FERRARI x SEGWAY

For a second, let’s forget the fact that this costs double the price of a regular Segway. Instead let’s focus on Ferrari thinking that just because they painted it fire red and slapped a Ferrari emblem on it, the Segway would become cooler. Nah, son. In fact, it makes it that much cornier. Ferrari selling a Segway is like Rick Ross pushin’ Slim Fast, shit just doesn’t add up.
HONDA CUFFLINKS

Whatever your set may be, we here at Complex are all for the reppin’ of it as long as you don’t come off as a rabid fanboy. And if you wear these Honda cufflinks, that’s exactly what you’ll come off as. Unless you work for Honda, these are a no go.
CORVETTE PUTTER

Unless you’re under the age of 10, your golf clubs should come from actual golf companies. Rick Wagoner and Bob Lutz would throw you outta the country club if you pulled these out of your bag.
CHRYSLER 300C BENCH

This bench is just laughable. Not only is it ugly, there’s a big Chrysler 300C on it. We know that was one of Chrysler’s most popular cars of late—we’re fans—but this is just silly.

Please don’t associate that ridiculous crap with Lamborghini, that is not produced and/or condoned by the factory, unlike the Ferrari branded garbage which is factory approved. The Lamborghini merchandise comes from the son of the late founder of Lamborghini, Tonino Lamborghini. It’s his name too, and he’s playing off of it as far as he can take it with everything from energy drinks to coffee makers; his father is probably rolling over in his grave.
Comment by pdisme — August 21, 2008 #
yo the lighter with the bull on it is kinda tough. me likey. send me???
Comment by DeShawn Stevenson — August 21, 2008 #