NEWS

The Unauthorized History Of Puppets In Hip Hop

Whatchya wanna do? Wanna be a ballers? shotcallers? Brawlers? Well let Complex be the spoiler. The reality of hip hop is a sad one filled with guys who get their strings pulled, like Jimi Hendrix (no Pat Smear, my dear). And occasionally you can actually see their strings. Take for instance the awesomely creative new clip from Complex stalwart contributor Kanye West, which finds a styrofoam ‘Ye sucking wind in the Olympics (no Louganis) like a “Champion”. We keed, we keed.

But Kanye isn’t the first hip hopper to use a strung-up effigy of himself in a video. So for your viewing pleasure, and general edification, we’ve combed through the annals (grow up!) of hip hop to find the 5 greatest moments of puppetry in rap history. Go to school and peep Kanye’s latest below…

5.) CHAMPION: Kanye West

He could only go up from the dismally “artistic” (read: deliberately boring, is still boring) “Flashing Lights” video, but talk about a comeback. The clip is so irreverent and hilarious that we must ask, even though you came in 5th, ‘Ye, did you realize that you were a champion? Yes, he did.

4.) ASS LIKE THAT: Eminem

Sure, this song and video is clearly the strongest evidence that Marshall’s lost his marbles—thanks mostly to his weird “is-he-wearing-mad-make-up?” look, and oh, that he obsessively wrote a whole song about a bizarre fight with a hand puppet on national TV nearly a year earlier—but Eminem’s slap-ssic ranks #4 due to it’s excellent use of the Todd “REAS” James designed Crank Yanker puppets and Triumph the Insult Comic Dog. That said, the song never made our slinky’s go d-doing-doing-doing!

3.) DA ART OF STORYTELLING:Outkast featuring Slick Rick

Look, this video is pretty retarded but it’s clocking in at #3 ’cause we’re hoping that Big Boi will see it and remember that flighty-ass Andre 3000 can be replaced by puppet Andre 3000, and us fans wouldn’t give a shit, as long as that motherfucker raps.

2.) ME AND THE BIZ: Masta Ace featuring… No one.

What do you do when Marley Marl promises you that Biz Markie will come thru in the 11th hour and track the vocals you left as a reference track for him—on the song you made called, of all things, “Me And The Biz”—but doesn’t deliver? You release the record as is, hope no one notices, and put out a video with a Biz puppet. He squeezed your lemons, Marley, now drink Ace’s lemonade!

1) HOW DO YOU WANT IT: 2Pac

Isn’t it lifelike? How much do you think Suge Knight paid those puppetiers for this 2Pac on strings? What’s that you say? A million dollars and a get out of jail free card? You are correct, siiiir! Wait, what’s that? It’s not a puppet? Whatever…For taking hip hop’s most radical, politically charged voice and getting him to make this video, which is easily more ridiculous than “Da Art Of Storytelling” to the power of “Ass Like That,” to the tune of 100 million in billing, Suge Knight easily owns the greatest moment of puppetry in hip hop. Time it give to daddy, Sugar. How do you want it?

BONUS RUNNER-UP! ANTE UP: M.O.P. (as portrayed by Bert ‘N Ernie)

This was A) better than the real “Ante Up” video, and B) would’ve taken the top spot if it had been done at M.O.P.’s behest. Now take rings off, fuckers.