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Women Who Will Sex You To Death

Be careful where you put your penis. That’s the lesson we learned from watching Hollywood Chainsaw Hookers, the B-movie classic about a detective who encounters a cult of chainsaw-worshipping prostitutes while looking for a runaway girl. It’s almost enough to make a dude stop plowing through professionals. In honor of the flick, which was just re-released to celebrate its 20th anniversary, Complex remembers other movie chicks who make men go flaccid with fear…


JESS WEIXLER (TEETH)
If there’s grass on the field, play ball. If the vagina has teeth, try anal.

GLENN CLOSE (FATAL ATTRACTION)
New pussy…not quite worth the hassle of a psycho side piece whose idea of a home cooked meal is boiling your kid’s pet rabbit.

SHARON STONE (BASIC INSTINCT)
She’ll ride you crazily and then, when the gush comes gushing, stab you up with an ice pick. Now that’s cold!

JENNIFER JASON LEIGH (SINGLE WHITE FEMALE)
Those sexy heels that appealed to your foot fetish are considerably less sexy when she stabs you in the eye with them.

PAM GRIER (FOXY BROWN)
Castration—not what you had in mind when you said you wanted to get a nut off.

NATASHA HENSTRIDGE (SPECIES)
This is why you don’t have unprotected sex with an alien: As soon as she gets the seed, she slays you. Fucking aliens never come in peace.

NICOLE KIDMAN (TO DIE FOR)
The power of the P-U-S-S-Y: convincing you to kill a man with mob connections. Seriously, don’t think with your dick if it’s got down syndrome.

LINDA FIORENTINO (THE LAST SEDUCTION)
The p is not free—especially when it’s attached to a thieving-ass wife who’s trying to manipulate you into killing the husband she stole $700K from. That’s why they call it a money shot.

NEVE CAMPBELL (WILD THINGS)
Double-crossing people with a hot, bisexual high school girl is great until the final twist—of poison in your drink, that is.

ELLEN PAGE (HARD CANDY)
What has the world come to when the young girl a pedophile lures back to his house turns out to be the more dangerous predator? You’ve never been so happy to see Chris Hansen.