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Jane (Publisher) Was A Lying Bitch!

We usually don’t wish death on any of Condé Nast’s magazines (barring Cargo of course, when they folded Complex’s ad pages went especially through the roof), but genteel Jane was one of those girly-girl mags we always hoped would go away. Not only did she disappoint us with that boob shoot, but she also never gave her flock enough ‘Love Giving Fellatio Daily’ features or other tidbits that could specifically benefit us. So we laughed when our associates once removed over at Ecko sent us this letter from the publisher of Jane that was inserted in “comp issues” to solicit advertisers before it went belly up. After reading all the upbeat predictions, we can’t help but wonder whether publisher Carlos Lamadrid was completely in the dark or entirely delusional about Jane’s imminent demise. Probably had to do with the whole keeping up appearances thing. Either way, it serves as a fitting tribute and even better example about just how full of shit publisher’s letters are in the first place. Read the full spin after the jump, or check out the highlights here:

Welcome to the Jane Beauty and Body Issue. Because here at JANE, things just keep getting hotter.
Ad pages are up more than 20% for the first half of 2007 and we show no signs of cooling down.
Expect our circulation mix to change as a result of so many individual subscriptions coming in (allegedly due to posting breast thing online).
We’ll keep you posted on this tremendous growth.
What’s next? Don’t miss JANE’s annual Naked issue in August.