// M.E. AGAINST THE WORLD // Marc Ecko VS Grace Park
IF YOU WERE STARTING A SECRET SOCIETY, WHO WOULD BE IN IT AND WHAT WOULD YOU DO?
I would have a secret society of thousands of the world’s hottest women. I WOULD CONVINCE THEM ALL THAT I AM THE MESSIAH, and that between my legs lies the gateway to their salvation.
I’d take down the U.S. pharmaceutical industry, and the FDA, and invite Spitzer back. He’s out of a job, right? And I’d call Hillary. And Andrew Weil as well. And Oprah!
WHAT ARE THE DIRTY DETAILS OF YOUR IDEAL RUBDOWN?
My ideal rubdown would be the elusive six-handed massage by the Swedish Bikini Team-topped off with a happy ending by Kim Kardashian.
That’s kind of a loaded question, man. OK...FULL-BODY MASSAGE, WITH OIL, BY SOMEONE I KNOW, PREFERABLY.
WHAT’S THE BEST WAY TO MAKE SURE YOU GET LAID AT A WEDDING?
Nine times out of ten, I GO FOR THE BEST LOOKING, DIVORCED MILF. They’re easy to pick out, and are almost always ripped, ripe, and ready.
Get loaded, with them. The line that worked on me was “Hi. What’s your name?” I was like, Wow, no one’s ever said that to me before. I married him.
WHAT’S THE LONGEST YOU’VE GONE WITHOUT WEARING DEODORANT?
What’s deodorant?
Um, since sixth grade. I DON’T WEAR DEODORANT. I’m Asian. I don’t smell. Unless I don’t shower. Is that a hint? Does everybody in the world wear deodorant?
WHAT WAS THE BEST SUMMER BBQ YOU’VE BEEN TO?
One of my best friends drove a midget motorcycle off the diving board into my pool. WITHIN TWO MINUTES, EVERYONE WAS IN THE POOL FULLY DRESSED-THEN TOOK THEIR CLOTHES OFF. I don’t think the grill ever got turned on.
My friend had an inflatable party-barge at his chalet, but it was tied to the dock. I was like, “What’s fun about this?” Once everyone got drunk enough, we untied the raft.
Home » CURRENT ISSUE » M.E. AGAINST THE WORLD » Marc Ecko VS Grace Park
In the Blogs
JOIN OUR NEWSLETTER
