The ex-NFL lineman and Get Smart’s comedic secret weapon reveals his life’s contradictions.

As told to Jack Erwin; Photograph by Peter Graham I’m not a loner… But I don’t mind being different. You have to understand, I’m from Flint, Michigan, where you have to fight your way into the school. I learned how to roll by myself and do my own thing at a very young age. I can sense when I’m becoming too much like anybody else, and I feel an urge to change.

Beat Street was like my hip-hop Star Wars. I wanted to be in the Rock Steady Crew. They had a chapter of the Zulu Nation in San Diego, and when I was on the Chargers, I joined…But they smoked so much, I was like, “Damn, I’m going to get a contact high.” I knew I couldn’t do it, but that’s my upbringing.

I didn’t know how to act... But I was like Dammit, I’ma learn. At my first audition, they said, “Just dress wild.” So I got my face painted, got Spandex, a Star Trek thing to go around my chest. I was looking like a space alien. The producers told me later, “The fact you were willing to be so uncool made us pick you.”

I’m a pretty corny dude. That’s it. I wasn’t cool at all in high school... But the coolest guy in my high school works in a car wash now. It’s almost like I go full circle. I’m so uncool that I’m cool. My kids are like, “I’m embarrassed.” And I’m like, “Are you embarrassed by that new car? Nah, I don’t think you are.”

Thirty percent of people like you, 30 percent are undecided, and the rest hate you. You can’t really do anything about that…But I’m going to do my job pleasing the ones that like me. I get plenty of people that are like, “Dude, I’m watching the movie because of you.” That’s a good feeling.

White Chicks was rated one of the worst movies ever, right along with Norbit... But I love that stuff. There’s not a character I’ve played that I haven’t enjoyed. If I didn’t love it, I wouldn’t do it. I’ve turned plenty of stuff down that could have been all right, but I thought it was wack. If I’m in it, you can bet I’m with it.

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